Akal Bodhon

Akal Bodhon  |  Acrylic on Canvas  |  16"x18"  |  2009

I dont believe in god.
So most people ask me, Why this painting?
This painting is from 2009 - the year I was undergoing Chemotheraphy.
I dont quite remember which month, but Im guessing it was during November or December.
I painted few canvases that time.
They till date remain my most precious, cherished artworks.
Each of them painted with care and patience, pain and thought.
Each of them telling a story of my journey in some way or the other.
And each unique in their thought process.


This one, however, is relatively simple.
It represents the Akal Bodhon.
Most people wont understand what the term means.
So. To keep it simple, and taking from a popular website:
"In the 'Ramayana', as it goes, Rama went to 'Lanka' to rescue his abducted wife, Sita, from the grip of Ravana, the king of the Demons in Lanka. Before starting for his battle with Ravana, Rama wanted the blessings of Devi Durga . He came to know that the Goddess would be pleased only if she is worshipped with one hundred and eight 'NeelKamal' or blue lotuses. Rama, after travelling the whole world, could gather only one hundred and seven of them. He finally decided to offer one of his eyes, which resembled blue lotuses. Durga, being pleased with the devotion of Rama, appeared before him and blessed him. The battle started on the 'Saptami' and Ravana was finally killed on the 'Sandhikshan' i.e. the crossover period between Ashtami (the next day) and Navami (the day after). Ravana was cremated on Dashami. Since the period of this worship was different from the conventional period (during the spring - 'Basanta'), this puja is also known as 'Akal-Bodhan' or a worship (Bodhan) in an unconventional time (A-Kaal)."
[ThankYou Wikipedia]

So what does this mythological story have anything to do with me?

Well.
I feel it does.
I don't believe in god.
But I do believe in the power of a woman, as represented by Durga.
I belive in patience and the determination or willpower that resides in this story.

I have always been fascinated by Durga.
And the power that she embodies.
Dont get me wrong.
I dont like the goddess.
I like the woman and mother in her.
Me falling sick was untimely (A-Kaal) and it was a battle that had to be fought and won.
When I was painting this, I wasnt invoking the goddess.
I was invoking my own powers as a woman to help me in the journey.
[I firmly believe that a woman is strong. Anyone who can endure labour pains Cannot possibly be weak.]

Thinking of the symbolic representation (as in the painting - the spear through the third or inner eye and cutting through the bindi) has always brought to my mind the power of a woman.
The red bindi is conventionally associated with feminity.
However, juxtaposed with it, is the spear that runs through it.
The force and power of it.
The inner eye, symbolic of Knowledge and Understanding.

For me, this painting is therefore me trying to garner whatever I needed before I went into battle with my last few cycles of Chemotheraphy (which are the hardest to deal with).
Firstly, My own feminine strength and willpower.
And secondly, a better Knowledge and Understanding of my Life.
But most importantly, a wider perspective to my own Inner Self, that in turn would help me to go on.

By the end of it, the painting therefore tells My story.
Me, with my powers, conquering the untimely sickness.
Or so I hope to believe. :)